Friday, May 8, 2009

Mother's Day

I've had this post bouncing around my head for two years now (still CAN NOT believe that I've been blogging for two years!). It's actually been a 'draft' for a year now. I feel really strongly about this, but the problem is that I'm struggling to get it to come out right. Well, I'm going to stop revising it and just push here goes!

I have such conflicting feelings about Mother's Day. I love my own Momma so much and love celebrating and honoring her every in that view, I love Mother's Day.

As a woman who has struggled with infertility for many years, I know how painful Mother's Day can be. The pain of infertility is so deep and yet so silent...making it even deeper.

During my initial infertile years, I clung to my Jesus more than ever. I cried out to Him on a daily basis, and that was the only thing that brought peace during that time.

The problem is that even though Jesus was my only comfort, the church seemed to only deepen my pain on a day that was very painful to begin with. Every aspect of the service, as well as everything before and after the service on Mother's Day reminded me that I was not a mother. It was very tough to go to church on Mother's Day during those painful years.

I don't have anything against celebrating Mother's Day (and didn't during my initial infertile years...I've already said that I love celebrating my Momma....and I loved celebrating her during those years as well). I guess I just have a problem with celebrating Mother's Day on a corporate level. On Father's Day, most churches have 'regular' services which they add an "Oh by the way, Happy Father's Day" to it.

Well, I'm not sure if any of this is coming out right so I'll just shush for now. I guess what I really want you to know is that if you know any women struggling with infertility...just give her an extra hug and let her know you're praying for her this Mother's Day.



Rachel said...

I understand. I've never struggled with infertility but I did have two Mother's Days where I was a single mom and it was ever so awkward at church. I felt horribly out of place and didn't stand up when they asked the mom's to stand. Any how. Happy Mother's Day. I love your pictures of you sweet princesses.

traci said...

It came out right and I understand and agree. A horrible event happened in my life on a holiday and now, every year, as people ask how I am going to celebrate or what I am doing, it just gives little stabs to my heart. But hey, I certainly don't want to respond with "Well, I hate this holiday because..." And of course, you know just how much I love telling people "No, I am really sure we are not having more kids because..."

Anyway, good point and glad you were able to get it out.

Hope you are having fun at the beach. We have a tornado watch here at home.